Update

The wedding is in eight days. My parents arrive tomorrow. They are coming early to help me get the house whipped into shape (Mom on the inside, Dad doing yardwork). So, of course, I have to pre-clean before Mom gets here.

I'm stressed. Not horribly so, but the hours on the clock are whizzing by far faster than the amount of stuff I've done would indicate. (Did that make sense?)

R did a barter deal with a furniture company- he's trading a website for furniture! And they're having a half-price sale! The owner is so cool. Even though they just worked the deal out yesterday, he's letting us get the furniture in time for the wedding. So far I've picked out a new sofa and two chairs. New! I've never had a new sofa before! It's cushy and pretty and bright red. And I still have about $1000 left.

This isn't the first time he's bartered like that. He's a really good designer, so sometimes clients who couldn't afford him otherwise jump at the chance to trade. Can you tell I'm proud?

Also, I think I'm getting a cold. Dammit.

I don't even KNOW them anymore.

I went today to one of those lingerie stores where the sales associates really know how to fit you properly for a bra. I figured, I've spent years guessing what size I am. Might be fun to find out what size I actually wear.

Just for the record, my usually approach to bra purchasing is to grab a dozen, ranging in size from 40D to 44DDD and just try, try, try until I find one that seems to fit. The last one I bought was size 42DD.

My size today?

38 G.


G.

As in

oh
my
GOD.

Kitchen Meme

Since Sarah Louise was kind enough to comment a few days ago, I felt free to pilfer her meme from blackbird.

In the kitchen with...Sharon

-Variety is the spice of life.

In my cupboard, I have this many spices: None. Well, maybe two or three. Most of them I keep in little ziploc bags in a container in the refrigerator.

Alphabetize? Nope, they're just thrown in the container.

Which recipe? Anything sweet.

It's like the pot calling the kettle black.

Coffee or tea? Coffee in the morning, tea in the evening.

Do you make coffee at home? Sometimes. But usually I buy it at the gas station.

If you make tea, loose or in bags? Bags. Canadian. MUCH better than American.

How many kinds of tea do you have? Four, but I only drink two.

If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.

I use my stovetop: Usually daily, but since the beginning of March I've been on Jenny Craig, so now only to cook vegetables.

I use my oven: Ditto, because of the diet. I microwave my meals. Did I mention, I'm getting really tired of microwaved meals.

Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

Soy or cow? Moo.

Skim or whole? Skim. I can't drink whole anymore- it tastes like heavy cream.

How many gallons a week? Two, between the two of us.

There's nothing like rejection to make you do an inventory of yourself. (James Lee Burke)

Three items in my freezer (right now): Jenny Craig meals. Too much meat that I've bought on sale. Fruit pops.

Three things in my fridge (right now): R's leftover pizza. Wine. Many, many condiments.

Item I am most chagrined about: A chicken that I cooked a week ago that I forgot to throw out on trash day. It's warm enough outside now that I don't want to put it out there unless it's going to be picked up right away, and now I have to wait until next Wednesday. Ick.

Item I bet no one else has: Kitty insulin. Homemade chow-chow. Moxie. ( I loooooove Moxie!)

It's the cat's ass, baby.

We've got a cat named Gunny. She's sweet, she's getting old, she's overweight and diabetic and requires insulin twice a day. She also has forgotten how to shit.

She still does it, and frequently, but she doesn't cover the poop up anymore. She also doesn't squat when she goes, so it ends up stuck all over her butt. And being a longhaired cat, she can carry a lot of poop around with her. And STINK? My God.

So once every couple of weeks (not more often because it really stresses her out), I have to give her a bath. I hold her down in the water and let her soak to loosen the dried poop. Then I shampoo her and wrap her in a towel and hold her for a while to calm her while some of the water is soaked up by the towel. Meanwhile, she yowls like she's being set on fire.

She likes to sleep on R's desk while he works. When she reeks, he can't stand it. So today was bath day.

Right this minute, there is a cat that hates me sitting in the other room.

Phone Home

My parents were here back in March. My dad wallpapered the kitchen for me (yes, I know wallpaper is ugly but my walls were even uglier), and during his Bob Vila stint he cut a wire to an unused phone jack.

We are now up to $500 in repairs to fix this phone jack, which was apparently the "boss jack" for almost all of the house.

It would have been cheaper to hire someone to wallpaper.

P.S. Dad did a great job, and he's awesome for helping me fix up the house, and I AM NOT TELLING HIM about this.

I'm not quite a quitter. I'm a get-back-to-laterer.

I give.

I feel so guilty that I never post on my other site (the underused bookcase) that instead of posting there and apologizing up and down to the unseen two or three people that might actually be looking, I'm starting a whole new spot. Once this wedding is done and I'm not on a diet and can actually COOK again, I'll start up that project again. But I think I'll keep here as a non-cooking related journal. Not that I ever posted much cooking there. Yet.

Why do all the names I come up with have "under" in them? Hm. Feel free to discuss with your therapist.

Wedding stuff... who was it that told me getting married at my house would be simple? I suppose it's easier than doing it at a church or hall with all the catering, flowers and planning that would require, but having to remodel just because people are coming that I don't want to see the state of the house as it is kind of sucks. I mean, it's nice getting things looking nicer, but it's only temporary because we're planning on doing a big remodel in about 6-9 months, which will involve ripping out pretty much everything we're doing now. I hope that plan works out. I hope we can afford it. We're both rebuilding what used to be crappe credit, thanks to my divorce and R's former "I'm an artiste!" lifestyle.

Anyway. Way more people coming than I expected. (Cool! Visitors!) Some are party animals, some are extremely conservative church-going types. (We are more like party kittens, who occasionally go to church.) Trying to show them all a good time, without offending anyone. While still having a good time ourselves, and oh yeah, getting married. Speaking of which- we don't have a JP yet. Anybody know one? Anybody who IS one? Come on over. We can promise you a burger, a margarita and a real party kitten good time for just 5 minutes of your time.